That be the question.
You see, I'm a bit of a walking contradiction because on the one hand I want to be involved in the wider community and do something of service to the Heathen community- I've sort of considered joining some kind of org and doing some kind of clergy training - I mean, around ten years experience as a Heatheny type person has to count for something, right? And I do know that the training in itself does not a gythja make - acceptance by your community in that role does.
However on the other hand, I make enemies faster than Don Giovanni due to my inability to be subtle...I'm as subtle as an airraid. I also kind of enjoy taking the piss out of some members of the Heathen community. If it makes folks feel better, I do it to members of the Pagan community too. Well, it's not my fault if they dress up all funny and come out with daft shit! They're asking for it.
And you see, it's this complete lack of tolerance that keeps me in this quandary. As soon as I hear any shit, it's like these alarms go off in my head and before I know it, my gob is open and I'm giving out about whatever that person is talking about.
There's a reason why my friends gave me the nickname 'Human marmite'.
There is simply no middle ground with me. You either love me or hate me.
And I do try to be diplomatic. Mr Josh - my lovely man is a very diplomatic chappie but I have a lot of trouble with that. It's ok on the internet because I can take a step back, think about what I'm going to say and edit anything too inflammatory out of my posts. In real life it's different. I don't think I'll ever master face to face diplomacy and I just know that were I to join an org, something would happen - I wouldn't be able to sit there with a straight face/without making an outburst/without making enemies with well known people and it'd all go down the pan.